Murphy's Marketing Morals - Elegance
16th November 2009
Lying face down on the ground in the middle of Canary Wharf wasn’t my finest moment. Sartorially elegant moi? Er no.
And in case you’re wondering….no I wasn’t pissed.
And neither was it for some weird photo shoot either. No I fell over. In the middle of the day. And what’s worse was that I had an audience of about twenty youngish looking bankers decked out in pinstripes, fags in hand.
I’m going to sue Docklands Council. For my bruised dignity and my bruised knees. And for the price of a new pair of nylons. And let’s face it they’re not cheap. It was the curbs you see. They are too high. It was like the steps on The Great Wall of China all over again except this time it wasn’t for chariddy.
And I had to be helped up. Bleeding. The indignity. By the bankers. Not all of them at once. Although that might have been interesting. No… two polite souls hoiked me up under the arms and set me back on my feet. I was mortified yes, but strangely chuffed. Until it occured to me that I probably reminded the younger one (obviously he was only 16 if he was a day) of his mum.
Another chap picked up the strewn contents of my bag. Except the feminine hygiene articles. I can’t pick those up he said. No I said. Um thanks very much anyway.
And off I went as fast as I could looking like I’d been in the pub for a few hours and emerged the worse side of sober.
Back on the tube to Covent Garden. One change and thirty minutes later I’m back at River. Ordeal over.
Except it wasn’t. What’s that on your face Nicki? Mud. Brilliant.
Posted by River, 16th November 2009
Last night I had dinner with Simon Cowell
19th November 2009
Last night I had dinner with Simon Cowell, Cherie Blair and Richard Desmond.
I know! Get me.
Okay, so it was me and 1200 other people but Simon was only a table or two away. Okay, so it was three, but who's counting.
And actually, in the flesh, he's quite good looking. Obviously not in a Brad Pitt kind of way, rather more in a multi millionaire kind of way. But still.
And Cherie was actually okay. Apart from her bottom obviously and her very strange mouth, but she had a nice frock on and she spoke nicely. Lovely necklace too which must have set Tony back a packet. That said she probably brought it herself. Her being a human rights lawyer and all. And didn't she make that evident! Don't you just hate people who only talk about themselves.
Anyway back to me.
And then there was Richard. Well hed had a good night if you catch my drift. Very generous chap as well. Free copies of OK Magazine and the Daily Express for everyone. Ah! Obviously a cause close to his heart... to promote improved reading and better general knowledge that is.
All in all I felt priviledged for the invite. And Ive gained valuable kudos with my teenage daughter with the Simon connection. Okay, so I never admitted that I didn't, technically speaking, actually talk to Simon.
Why water down an advantage ? But we were breathing the same air and eating identical food. And we were only eight metres or so (as the crow flies) away from each other.
That definitely counts as having had dinner.
I'm sure if he actually met me next time wed be dining in the Ivy Club a deux, faster then you can say high waisted trousers.
Posted by River, 19th November 2009
